Seriously guys! A little bit more
romance, it’s easy. Men created movies to show how it works. No more excuses. I get it , sometimes we are a little complicated (me, the first) but come on. Because I know that we all dream of the perfect date but we are caught up by the sad reality. There are some surprises that we have already been through and don’t look like the ones we fantasize on.
Situation: A male character who is very seductive and
clever. He was the first one to confess his feelings.
1) Ask me out?
Dream: *Dring… Dring… *
-Yes, Maeve. It’s Harry! Are you free on Saturday night? Because I would like to take you to dinner at Blabla restaurant at 7!”
Bam, ! You start flying.
Real life: You ask him out and you plan the whole thing. Of course, you have to choose between things Mister can afford. For the best, he texts you saying : “When could I see your little head?”…
2) One to One
D: He better say directly if he is nervous. It would be super cute and asking for his friends not to come, will not make us being like an unsociable person.
RL: The date is planned and he starts saying: “By the way, can Rubben and Claudia come with us ? They’re so funny, you’ll see” Obviously they are, according to the LOL moments between the 3 BFFs.
3) Falsely innocent proposal
D: Don’t try to talk about the improper proposal. NEVER. Sex is not a debt.
RL: “- I don’t want to go out, plus, the whether is bad ( or I don’t have money anymore). Do you want to come home ?
– Euh… really dude, I barely know you…
– Don’t worry, nothing is going to happen”.
BIG FAT LIE! 99.8% of them will try something.
4) The mythic addition
D: Invite us. It’s so refreshing when somebody wants to take care of us.
RL: We provide our own money because we are Miss Independents and because the haberdashery is dead since euh… Anyway, thanks to some gruesome kids who hide themselves behind the princip of equality between men-women.
5) Le look
D: We dream of having a classy dressed-up rendez-vous, with a pretty dress and heels without looking over-dressed!
RL: Ok, we are not posh at all, but don’t let them kill the Respect: with a sport suit, a hair style and bear like a jungle man, a bad smell and.. I stop. We guys always make an effort , even the tacky ones. What about them ?
D: It has been hours that you’re talking like you have known eachothers since chilhood. He exactly looks a like the pictures and he stayed himself but he’s not a starving wolf at all!
RL: The most beautiful of the beautiful boy comes to talk to you with some spelling mistakes that you forget, thanks to his big smile, he’s romantic, mostly perfect. This is the good illusion of fakes! Mister has never been and will never be
7) Mortal assimilation
D: “Oh, what you do is super cool ! You will show me one day!” *Blushing*. Anyway, he thinks that your talent, I mean being able to talk, texting someone and eating at the same time is uncommun!
RL: “Oh, you know how to do that too ? My friend Caro is the best for this.”
“You remind so much of..!”
Stop there. I’m unique !
8) The sponger phone
D: A silent phone he checks only when we are in the bathroom. There is nothing more simple.
RL: He plays with it as if it was a joystick and we become obsessed watching his hand
s. Or, he says that Andre posted the last pictures of Naomie’s party on Facebook. Allo the Earth!
9) Kissing or not kissing
D: Perfect timing, you’re about to go home but you stay there looking right into his eyes… Then he gives you a delicate and gentle kiss.
RL: When you want him to do it, nothing happens. And when you don’t want it, he tries to put his tongue near our tonsils. Just stop fooling yourselves, guys!
10) Quiproquo, Quiproqui, Quiprocu !
D: You’d rather be honnest from the beginning to be able to be on the same page, with the same expectations, but especially having a respectful and nice relationship which keeps both of us sane!
RL: It’s been two hours that you smile to everything he says even the dumb stuff and he confesses you the truth: “I’m in a state where I just look for fun and you see you’re a good girl, so I prefer to tell you now”.
First of all, we don’t need them to know if we are good girls or not . And the second part, he forced us to dress up and go out instead of staying at home to watch Criminals Minds.
At this point, it’s not too much to ask. Let’s revise our requirments to the next level! Guys who come like if everything was served on a silver tray, it’s over!